Dancer
by Leslie Schmidt
Dear Diary:
There's a new boy in the Senior Ballet class. I don't know his name but he's really cute. He's got curly black hair and dark eyes. While I was waiting for my class to start I heard a couple of the girls from his class laughing. One said it's too bad that all the boys there are gay because he's so great looking.
Dear Diary:
The new boys name is Thaddeus but we call him Todd. He just moved here from Texas, his dad works in Manhattan. He's 16 and is in 10th grade. He's been dancing for eight years and was even in a company in Texas. I don't think he's gay because he was holding hands with Marline, one of the Senior girls.
Dear Diary:
Todd helped with my class today, Mrs. Colleen said that he would be helping out from now on because she wanted us to get used to being picked up, "aerials". It was so neat, he's so strong. We did this thing where he picked me up by the waist and held me over his head. I leaned out and put my legs out straight and he spun around three times before he put me down. Some girls were scared but I really enjoyed it.
Dear Diary:
I'm so excited!!!! Mr. Colleen talked to me today and said she wants me to practice with the senior company for the performance. She said that I was so good at the aerials with Todd that she wanted him to dance a solo with me!! Now I'll be going to rehearsal on Wednesday nights too. Oh no! That means that I can't play softball on the 5th grade team anymore. Mrs. Jackson will be mad at me.
Dear Diary:
Mom called Mrs. Jackson about softball and then said everything would be ok. She said something about Todd's dad giving the school an "endowment" and that it was more important than softball. It has something to do with the studio moving to a bigger place and paying for it.
Dear Diary:
I'm soooo tired. My legs really ache. I didn't know that the Seniors worked so hard. It was also hot in the studio. Todd is so neat, and he's so cute. He doesn't treat me like a kid, he talks to me just like he talks to the other girls. Of course, they all treat me like a kid. One of them told me I looked funny with the bumps under my leotard from my panties.
Dear Diary:
Mommy took me to a dance shop and bought me a whole bunch of leotards and tights. She also bought me a wrap, leg warmers, and new technique shoes. When we were driving home, mommy told me not to wear panties under the tights, that if I was going to dance with the senior girls, I couldn't have my panties showing through the fabric.
Dear Diary:
I think I'm making a lot of the girls jealous. The girls in my class are being mean to me because I dance with the Senior class and the girls there are mean because I dance with Todd. But, he's so neat.
Dear Diary:
Today, after rehearsal, Todd took me out to eat. It was almost like a real date! I had to call Mom and she said it was alright. We drove to a Jason's Deli. His car is sooo cool. It's a silver Miata. We had to top down. I felt kind of funny being there in my leotard but Todd was also wearing his (but he had put on some gym shorts. Then, when we were driving home he took my hand and squeezed it.
Dear Diary:
Todd asked me if I want to go to a movie! I'm so scared to ask Mom. I'm afraid she'll be mad.
Dear Diary:
Mom said ok!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dear Diary:
This is kind'a strange. Mommy said that Todd would be babysitting me while she went out on Friday at the same time I am going out with Todd. She said that she was going to go out with Todd's dad. She said that after the movie was over, we're supposed to come home and wait for them and that it would probably be late.
Dear Diary:
Todd kissed me! He drove me home from Senior's today and, just as I was getting out of the car he pulled my arm and then kissed me. I think I'm falling in like with him.
Dear Diary:
Tonight's the big night. I just couldn't pay attention in school! Mommy said that she was going to help me get dressed up when she got home from work. She even said she'd let me wear make up. I'll write later and tell you all about it.
Dear Diary:
I was soooo tired last night that I fell asleep. Well, let me tell you all about it!
Mommy got home about 5 and said we had only an hour to get ready. While I was in the shower, Mommy picked out clothes for me. I was really surprised. She had laid out just my yellow tube top and a black mini. I thought she'd want me in a dress. I put them and my sandals on. Mommy was drying her hair. She put it up in a real fancy way, she had an evening gown laid out on the bed. Then she had me sit next to her and, as she put her makeup on, she put it on me too. She said not to put my hair in a pony tail but to leave it down.
Todd and his dad got there at the same time. I was thinking we were going out on a double date, really kind of confused, Todd wasn't dressed up but Mr. Thompson was all dressed up. When we got outside I saw Todd's Miata and a limo. The driver was holding the door. Mommy told me to have fun as they got in the limo and Todd opened the door of his car for me.
We waited in the car until they had driven away, then Todd kissed me. I was so surprised! I didn't know what to say, I just sat there. Then he pulled me to him again and kissed me again. Next he started the car and we drove off-as if nothing had happened.
We went to Denny's for dinner. Todd told me all about his teachers and the school. It sounds so confusing, he has 6 different teachers. I can't keep my two straight. He goes to a private school in lower Manhattan. He rides to school with his dad in the limo every morning, then takes the subway and train out the island in the afternoon. I told him about my teachers and then he told me about Texas.
On the way to the movie, he held my hand when he wasn't shifting gears. The Miata has a stick. It was neat. He put my hand on it and then showed me how to shift!
We saw "Batman and Robin." It was really cool. Todd put his arm around me-that was cool too. I don't know why, but I folded up the arm on the seat-I was so scared he'd be mad-but he just put his arm tighter around me. It was so nice. When the movie was over, he kissed me again. Then as we were leaving he kept his hands on my hips. Once, when the line stopped, he pulled me back against him and hugged me.
When we got home we sat down on the couch and kissed some more. I've never been kissed by a guy before-I mean for real kissing-and I liked it a lot. Then he frenched me! Other girls have talked about it-it was neat. When he moved his hand and started rubbing my chest I said "no" and he smiled, then he kissed me again but he never tried again. We frenched so much my tongue got tired!
Oh, Diary, I think I'm falling in love with him! I can't wait till class on Monday!
Dear Diary:
On the way home from church, Mom asked me about my date. I told her I had a lot of fun. She said that she saw us sleeping on the sofa that we were cute "cuddled up like kittens." I thought Dedi barking woke us up in time. I thought she'd be mad but she said no.
She said she had a great time with Mr. Thompson. They went to a concert at Lincoln Center. She said he was really nice too, just like Todd and she hoped he'd ask her out again.
Dear Diary:
Class went really well. Todd and I danced a lot. I think the other girls have figured out what's going on and they're jealous. We don't make a big show at class but Todd sits next to me while other girls are dancing and we talk when we can. I'll be seeing him again on Wednesday.
Dear Diary:
Mommy arranged for Todd to pick me up for class today. It was raining so he had the top up. We talked and listened to the radio on the way there. The class was a lot of fun, at least for me. Todd was helping teach and he kept asking me to partner with him when he showed us things. I guess I know most of the steps already.
On the way home he asked me if I wanted to stop to eat. I said I had to call Mom and she said ok. We had McDonalds. Mom called me back and said that she was going out to a meeting for work and that she'd be home around 9.
When we got to the house Todd came in and, before we even got to the living room he hugged me and kissed me. OOOhhh, it was soooo nice. I love kissing Todd. We went into the kitchen and drank got some cokes, then watched TV.
Can I tell you a secret? You have to promise not to tell?
I let Todd feel my nipples.
We were kissing, I was sort of sitting on his lap and he started to real gently rub my chest. My nipples are real sensitive and sort of stick up. At first it tickled, but then it made me feel real warm and sort of nervous-like. But not really nervous, just my heart was beating real fast.
He pushed his hand up under my top (I was wearing that black halter dance top). It felt so good, he was really gentle, just rubbing his fingertip back and forth. I started to get, you know, gooey and, well, I guess I chickened out. I told him to stop. I hope he's not mad, he didn't seem to be. He just smiled and we kissed more.
I told him that Mom would be home at 9, so he left around 8:30. I was in the shower when she got home.
Dear Diary:
Real quick before I go to school. Todd called this morning and asked me if I wanted to go out on Friday. I hope Mom says yes.
Dear Diary:
SHE SAID YESSSSSSSSSS!!!!
Dear Diary:
I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD I LOVE TODD
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
Dear Diary:
I guess that tonight's going to be sort of like last week. Mommy's going out with Todd's dad again. I'll tell you all about it later.
Dear Diary:
I don't know if I should tell you about all this but, you are such a good friend. Please never tell anyone, ok? Good.
Tonight, Todd and I went to see "Addicted to Love." The movie was almost empty. We sat alone and Todd kissed me. You, know, it's so romantic in the movies and, well, we kissed a lot. Then he moved his hand up my shirt. I was really kind of scared. All I could think was what if someone saw. But, it also made me tingle all over. He pulled my leg over his and then put his hand on my thigh. I was so scared, we'd be in so much trouble if someone saw us. I can't believe what I said. I don't know where it came from, but I said, "No, not here." I couldn't believe I said that! He stopped and just smiled at me and we watched the rest of the movie.
When we got out of the movie, I had a message on my phone from mom, it said she was going out and wouldn't be home till late. A few minutes later, Todd's phone rang. I could tell he was talking to his dad. Then he handed the phone to me and said that mom wanted to talk to me. I was surprised, it was sort of weird. She said that she wouldn't be home till tomorrow and that Todd would watch me. We went for a walk around the mall, I tried on some jeans at Abercrombie, then we played some games at the arcade. Then we went to Todd's so he could get some things.
His place is so cool! They live on the 35th floor of a high rise, way up in the Penthouse. From their living room, you can see downtown. We sat down and watched some TV. Really, I wanted to make out. It wasn't long before Todd was feeling me. Oh, I love him so much! I just pulled my shirt off over my head. I don't know what made me do it, it just happened. Todd looked so surprised, then I felt embarrassed. I hugged him to cover myself up. I've never been seen like that by a guy before. I was afraid he'd laugh at me. I don't have big breasts like those women in magazines, just my two little nubs. Mommy says they'll grow, not to worry. I know guys like girls with big breasts. I was so afraid that Todd would laugh, that he'd see I am just a little 11 year old kid.
We kissed some more, then he pushed me back. "You're beautiful," he said. Now I was embarrassed. I could feel myself blushing. Then he pulled his shirt off! He has such a strong chest. I put my hand on is, it was so hard. I'm sure he must be able to do 100 pushups.
Then he pushed me back and we lay down on the sofa. He started rubbing my nipples again, it felt so good. We kissed for ever. He lifted up and looked down at me, then he leaned down and sucked one of my nipples! It felt sooooo good. All I could do was hug his head. Then I felt his hand move up my thigh. I didn't care, I wanted him to. He started rubbing me down there, moving his hand back and forth. It was like when I do it alone, only a zillion times better. Mommy calls it an organism, that warm feeling that just spreads all over you. That happened to me almost right away. I know I shook and Todd just held me tight.
It didn't stop then. I was laying back, and Todd had lifted up, he was looking at me. Then he leaned down and started kissing me. Next he pushed his hand down my pants. I was a little scared because things are so tender down there. He rubbed my bump around just like I do sometimes, then he pushed his finger inside me. I almost exploded, I was shaking so hard that I pushed against his hand and kind of hurt myself. It just went on and on. When he tried to put two fingers inside it hurt and I told him just one. His hand was really tight in me jeans, so I undid them and sort of pushed them down a little. It was so nice, I just rolled and rolled. Todd pushed his finger way up inside me. He was half laying on me.
That's when, somewhere in my mind, I felt his- thing against my thigh. It was pushing against me, hard in his pants. He was sort of pushing it against me, rubbing it up and down slightly. I reached down and ran my hand between us. Todd rolled back slightly and I felt it in his pants. It was about six inches long and felt like broom handle. As soon as I touched it, Todd started pushing it back and forth against my hand and pushed his finger deep inside me. I had another organism.
I lifted my hand up, then I tried to push it inside his pants but his belt was too tight. "Here," he said, rolling onto his beck. He pulled his hand out of my pants, then undid his belt and pants. He pulled them down slightly. His-penis-was hard up against his belly. The head is pinkish brown, then the rest is white with blue veins. It was warm, hot, and the skin was soft over the hardness underneath. I started rubbing it up and down. Todd started to breath hard and hold on to me. I stopped long enough to push my pants down all the way, I wanted to feel him against my thigh.
Todd looked at me, his eyes had a glazed look. I was suddenly very afraid that he'd not like me, I felt so small, so much like a little kid. "God, you're beautiful," he said. My heart leapt, I love him so much!!!
He reached out and ran his finger along me. A shiver went through me and I pushed my legs apart. Again he pushed his finger inside me. A warm wave ran over me. I held his penis against me, it was hot and smooth against my hip. His hair kind of tickled me as he rubbed it up and down. He was moving his finger in and out too and we were kissing, frenching like crazy. I had another organism, it spread across my belly and down my legs. Todd pushed real hard against me and sort of shook. I knew what was happening, Mommy has told me about the stuff that men squirt.
Suddenly it was all wet on my hip and side. Todd grunted and pushed again, I could feel his penis twitching against me and more wetness. He sighed and relaxed against me.
"I love you so much," he said.
"I love you too."
We kissed more, then I lifted my hand up. It was all wet with his stuff. My palm and wrist was all smeared with his white stuff. It was also all over my hip and up my side. I didn't know they made so much!
Todd sort of laughed, then took a blanket and wiped his goo up. I was all gooey too, down between my legs. We kissed a lot more. Then I told Todd that we really should get to my house because Mom might call there to see if we were back.
Todd said he had to change his pants because he had "come" on them. I guess that's what guys call it. He got up and then really surprised me by taking his pants off. That's when I realized we were both naked! I was kind of embarrassed. He pulled me up and we stood and kissed. His penis was still kind of big but not hard and he dripped a little more of his stuff on me.
As soon as we got home he kissed me again and he kind of pushed his knee between my legs. All I did was take his hand and we went to my room. I really didn't mean to go all the way but, well, it just sort of happened, ya'know.
Todd first took my top off, we were standing and kissing. Then he took his shirt off, then undid his pants and pulled them down. His penis was sticking out again. I pulled my shorts off, then we tried to hug. It was kind of silly, his thing was sticking out and he pushed it against my tummy. I laughed at him, then I was scared he'd be mad. He just picked me up and lay me down on my bed. We cuddled and kissed a lot. He pushed his fingers in me again and sucked on my nipples-I must have orgasmed ten times.
I really don't know how it happened, I was laying on top of him and we were laughing. I had my elbows on both his collarbones and I shifted around to get more comfortable and, suddenly, I realized that his penis was, well, it was pushing against my slit. We stopped and looked at each other, then he pushed against me and his tip went just a little bit inside. He had this far away look in his eyes, I was a little scared, but I also wanted to, well, you know. I wanted to know what it was like. I pushed back against him and it hurt. I could feel his heart pounding so hard in his chest! I just knew that I had to do what he wanted so I pushed harder. At the same time he pushed and, well something sort of gave and he was way inside me. It stung a lot but it also felt real good. We moved back and forth some and I had another orgasm. From then on, it just went on and on. Then I felt him spurting his stuff inside me. I didn't care, it felt so good.
A little while later he was done and I rolled off him. That's when I saw the blood, so did he. It had gotten all over the sheets. I'm so scared mom will find out! We put them in the wash, even the pad, then he made the bed when I took a shower. Before we went to sleep I told him I was really sore.
I made oatmeal for breakfast this morning and we were watching TV when Mom got home.